After the brief two-day snow break, it was time to get back down to business, but on Zoom. While some students embraced the idea of a little extra sleep and not having to make the morning commute, the day brought some flashbacks of Zoom classes in the height of the pandemic.

Shenanigans were at an all-time high, as many students chose to extend their inclement-weather-based break, even as their classes commenced. 

“Not a single one of my students showed up for class,” lamented theology teacher Mike Lally. “Like, what were they thinking? We were going to have another conversational test. Who would want to miss out on that?”

The same thing happened in the physics classes of science teacher Kent Kershenski.

“I wasn’t too mad, though,” said Kershenski. “I was able to watch five straight hours of highlight reels from the past few years of the Buffalo Bills.”

The students that did log into Zoom and stay for class still were not totally engaged in the material.

“I was trying to teach about conic sections,” said algebra teacher Dan Becvar. “But I could only watch as Ryan Kellogg did snow angels in his backyard, with his camera on for the whole class to see.”

These experiences were shared by almost every teacher in every department. However, some were a little more exciting than others.

“One of my students was making hot chocolate as he recited Lewis Carroll’s ‘The Jabberwocky,’” said theatre teacher Kathryn Whitaker. “When he arrived at the ‘One, two! One, two!’ line, he dropped the boiling liquid on his feet and began to scream in agony. My entire Zoom class stayed to watch the paramedics carry him away on a stretcher.”

Even through the trials and tribulations of Zooming on a snowy day, St. Louis U. High hopes to return to normal once Monday arrives. We will all keep the hot chocolate victim in our thoughts and prayers.

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